Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Get Your Ass to Netherworld


I can't write about Netherworld without it sounding like I'm going way over the top. But it is what it is, man.

The scare actors at Netherworld materialize behind you from thin air.

Waiting in line at Netherworld is better than most pro haunted attractions. They know how to build your excitement. There is more amazing set and prop design to gawk at even before you get into the "no photo" area than you even have time for. And we took our sweet time.

You will sometimes notice a scare actor and tell yourself "ah, there's one. I won't jump." But they still get you.

You will never again be impressed with your county's corn-maze spookhouse after visiting Netherworld.

The scare actors at Netherworld can somehow swing an axe or sword within a hair's breadth of your face and never touch you.

Netherworld goes on and on, and on and on. You will not be rushed through and you will feel like you got every bit of your money's worth.

The scare actors at Netherworld might actually be real monsters. I am 50 but still not entirely sure about this.

When you exit the main haunt, there is still so much to see. The second haunt is shorter but always of equal quality. The new museum is very much worth the additional $5. They have about a dozen photo ops or more and games and stuff.

Dude really, some of the scare actors might have made a deal with the devil or something.

I mentioned lines. You might have heard about lines. Let me explain them to you. If you get a speed pass, you will miss out on what is to me an integral part of the Netherworld experience. I don't like crowds personally but you can just feel the excitement in the air. Here's why I like the lines:

1. We arrived before they opened and got in line to buy tickets. This outside line behind the building started moving just as soon as they opened, and because we got there about a half hour early, we got inside quickly. Once inside to buy tickets, there is an ominous hum that goes right into your bones. This mostly dark, high ceiling chamber is sparsely peppered with some incredibly detailed props, just enough to get your blood pumping.
2. With tickets in hand, you exit the building and walk around to the other side, careful to watch out for Sasquatch. He's out there, along with the Collector and others. This line moved surprisingly fast, even though we had left the premises to eat and came back over an hour later. Out here you are treated to some classic monster music. Also you will hear scream after scream from other customers surprised by scare actors who, as I said, seem to just appear from nowhere Mephistopheles-style and scare the crap out of you. They got my kids a few times. You will have several opportunities to make a photo with them in this queue.
3. At the end of this line they scan your tickets and you go into the Archive. Note: the Archive is not the Netherworld Museum. This area is a sort of line but take your time. We let others go ahead of us while taking in the details of the props. It's the final chance you have to make photos before the main attraction. Here you'll find yourself saying "is this real? Is this real?"
4. A curtain marks the end of the Archive, along with a stern warning about photos, courtesy of Dick Terhune. Beyond the curtain, you enter a grand hall that, while it is a sort of line, is really only there to break people into groups. But if you are like me you won't be in a hurry to leave this area. The ambiance is just too strong, too creepy, too Halloween my friend. It did move quickly though.

That's it. In summary, there are lines, but not the kind you want to miss. We were in the main attraction for at least half an hour but it's hard to say. Time moves differently in there. In every direction you look, there's something to see. Around every corner, there's something awesome and new.

I'm going to bed now, wondering if I asked a genuine vampire queen to pose for a photo with my kids...

No comments:

Post a Comment